Miss Maysha. She Woman.

Last, but definitely not least. My childhood BFF Maysha and I live on a rollercoaster within our friendship. At times, we're up, then we're going in circles and sometimes we crash. There's a bond which exists between us "that" neither of us can deny. We've experienced a whole lot together and we've also missed some beats in one another's lives.

She's beautiful and a pretty incredible woman. A mother to five children, but three are now adults. Her ability to persevere through challenging situations if a force to acknowledge. Of course, I can't rob her of the opportunity to share her own story so I'm sparing no personal details, however, I will share what she's meant to me and why she remains relevant in my life.

We've practically raised our children together. They share social networks and respect one another like family. We experienced our last pregnancies together and our daughters spent nearly every day of the first year of their lives together.

Growing up we were partners in crime. She'd tell her family she was at my house and I'd tell my mother I was down the street at her's, while we were blocks away flirting with older boys. We would call ourselves chocolate and vanilla.

I genuinely love my Maysha regardless what we've been through. Whether we're up or down, still I pray for her and her family. Not too long ago we were on an off-spell, but when she found out my mother passed away she came to check on me. In person. Being the loving, compassionate woman that she is, "it" wasn't a second thought to make sure I was ok under the circumstances.

I remember when I had my first daughter I couldn't seem to find a caring and safe babysitter to watch her while I worked nights. Even though Maysha had a housefull, she still extended help and kept my daughter for me on several occasions. My daughter would always spit up after a feeding and "it" took a whole lot more than just dabbing away the mess. She would have to change my daughters clothes, get her settled and calm again. Then she'd have to mop up the vomit. Would you know "this" phenomenal woman didn't complain once? Unbelievable, because I could hardly handle "this" from my own baby.

Maysha had to become a woman long before her mind and body was developed into one. She remains hopeful and determined, while putting forth her best efforts to create a comfortable lifestyle for her family. Her eldest son is now a father so she's a glamma (her word). Laughing out loud.

I must mention all the whoopla we cause when we go out in public together. Being single and liking to mingle is an understatement when we hit the town. Good "thing" we've been so busy attempting to readjust our lifestyles, "that" we haven't gone out in years, but I feel an itch coming on and she's mentioned "that" we're long overdue so "this" summer better watch out.

What we share in common most now is the lense we view our families from. Unfortunate, but a reality which we both have had to come to grips with. The first step towards our healing is acknowledgement. The second; taking positive action to make a difference in our own little families consisting of our children and circles of true friendship.

#GODain'tdonewithUSyetbetterasksomebody!

The Best Cousin. Quon.

The best cousin I've ever known. Wouldn't trade her for any other.

I love this little petite, chocolate, real-life china doll so much!!! She has a warrior's spirit and is the most self-encouraging person I know. When she's ready to share her own personal story she will. I can't rob her of the opportunity so I'll only share what she means to me. 

We met when we were in junior high school. She and her sister were pretty popular there. Quon embraced me immediately and we soon became inseparable. "This" woman has had my back since day one. Although, most of my upbringing has been in the hood, I was still quite naive in some areas, which made me very susceptible to becoming victimized by nonsense.

I had already experienced being bullied heavily and fights were waiting on me at "this" school. Quon inspired a great amount of bravery in my being. To stand tough on my own wasn't really my issue. Standing up against the negativity of the masses is where I faced some challenges and here, is where my cousin demonstrated a high level of concern for my well-being. 

As small as she was then, she had a mouth "that" spit fire like a dragon and no one would persistently bother her. I can't fail to mention how quickly her sister, my cousin Missy was to fight to defend her big-tiny sister. Kids from their neighborhood knew better than to mess with these two sisters and when they took me in, folks knew who I was related to so they didn't bother me either. Much of my own street-cred I owe to my big brother and cousins, Quon and Missy.

To date, she is still "something" like a warrior. She commands respect and gets "it." I recall a time when we were roommates and I couldn't get her to do what I wanted so we had a heated arguement. "It" escalated to the point where I felt we were better off going our separate ways and we did; for many years. Her forgiving heart led her to reach out to me by visiting my mother when she was alive. I was so stubborn, that I didn't acknowledge her efforts for a few more unnecessary years. 

I need my cousin in my life. I know "this" now more than ever. She is a rock. My rock solid family member. She accepts me with all of my flaws and doesn't mind sharing her opinion even if it makes me steaming mad. Laughing within. Through our relationship I've learned how to let go much better. I recover from being upset much quicker these days thanks to my beautiful cousin. I've seen how she does "it" and how much happier "it" makes her to move forward beyond offenses without holding a grudge against those "that" matter to her. She really is a real person. Like it or not, Quon is true to her person and does not live life as a phony made up character.

The LORD blessed me with "this" walking miracle to remain present in my life. Through her I see a whole lot of myself. We have matured into independent women together and I'm glad "that" Quon still remains relevant in my life.  

Two Days. Two More!!

To share about to complete this month's theme highlighting the VIPs in my life. 

Maysha & Quon are last, but far from least. Power Personalities to be described.

Resurrection Sunday 2016. Easter.

                   

 

           

Thank you JESUS!!!

I Love. My Friends.

...just when I'm feeling down with my back against the wall, "something" special happens, which reminds me, that I am fine just as I am and everything will fall into it's proper place at the right time!

GODFamily. Real Ones.

My GODmother Sharon took me in during my teenage years. I didn't live with her, but was able to visit whenever I wanted and she gave me "something" that I couldn't get from my biological family, which was trust. She trusted me in her home unsupervised. She allowed me to drive her car and her boyfriend's car. "This" was huge for me because she never made me prove myself to her. She took me as I was; embraced and complimented me about my character. Truly heaven sent into my life when every other door was closing in my face.  GOD is real!!! I love her. She's one of the greatest female role models in my life.

My GODsister Kaysh is the most beautiful, most loving, most generous and most compassionate person I have ever met. She's always been "this" way and still remains the same. With all the adversity she's faced and overcome, she exudes a genuine enthusiastic love for life itself. I'm talking about every living thing from people to animals, birds to amphibians, flowers to bugs, and so on. On countless occasions I've visited her in her home to find a new living creature she adopted by surprise. Laughing within. She is very creative with a sharp mind and quite disciplined in many areas. Raising her two sons as a single parent is her pride and joy. They're fine young men whom cherish their mother and are aware of the sacrifices she's made to provide them with a loving upbringing. She is the big sister I never had. I learned how to ride a two-wheel bicycle when I was 7-years old because she was patient enough to teach me and demonstrated how much she believed in me. There is absolutely no one like her. Not a soul. I'm forever grateful to know her as my GODsister and to be divinely connected regardless of time or space. I love her! We never skip a beat when we meet.

My GODsister Puma is cut from similar cloth as Kaysh. Puma is a poet and a rapper, but she'd probably prefer that I state her status as a rapper first. Isn't rap poetry of some sort? She and Kaysh are the ultimate funsters! I have had so much fun hanging out with them both and individually. Puma doesn't have any biological kids, but she's an aunt to all children. Very domesticated and highly protective of her loved ones, she keeps close watch on everyone and upkeeps her abode. She doesn't mind helping people and I love her as she is.

My GODsister UnkPep is the most down to earth soul one could meet. She's a self-employed barber, upcoming comedian and actor. She's an excellent conversationalist and has an intriguing mind. She's patient and always supportive of her family. She's one of the youngest looking nearly 50-year old's alive today. Seriously, she looks like she's still 30. She's fun too and one of the realest people in Los Angeles. We can agree to disagree, but never without love and respect for one another. I love her as she is.

My inherited mother MamaVonn is so cool. She has a humorous personality, but she doesn't take any mess. She was the first person ever, to come to my defense when my mother was being rude and disrespectful in the hallway of my old apartment building. Stern, but loving and concerned. Always kept an eye out for my children and our place. She's encouraging and believes in my abilities. I love her and PapaVonn, her husband.

Family is what you make and I love the design of mine. Thank you LORD for each one of them!!!

Fantasy Happy. Wednesday!

My Life-Size Image.

My Robin. Human Bird.

The one I was pregnant with, that a cutoff former family member tried to persuade me to terminate and not go through with "it" because she "didn't want me to be a statistic." I'm so glad, that I made up my own mind as I normally do. My baby girl keeps me on my toes because she's my wild child. She's enthusiastic about life, experiences and opportunities.

I remember missing my cycle in 2004. I didn't want to believe "that" I was pregnant because I had just told Mr. Man I didn't want to proceed any further in our relationship. Considering how I had just graduated from Pasadena City College with two Associate degrees and two vocational certifications, I thought the timing of my pregnancy wasn't too bad. Another unplanned, but still a blessing and gift.

Honestly, if I had interest in and wanted to create a new family with Mr. Man I believe he would've sided with me. I concluded, that he wasn't the man for me so I went through "this" pregnancy as a single mother by choice. "It" wasn't such a big deal to me experiencing "this" the second time.

When I told my mother, I remember like yesterday; she said, "How could you be so stupid?" I just replied, "how very rude, well there's no turning back now I'm having another baby and that's 'that'!" Rahbyn became my mother's "roadog" once she was born.

With "this" child of mine is where I learned what real parenting is. I had so much help with my firstborn daughter. When my second came along the help was all, but gone. The lifetime babysitter I thought I'd have around to help me raise 20 kids if I had them, passed away when I was 6-months pregnant. The LORD showed me how I had taken Ms. Mary for granted and "that" would be no more.

Of course, my youngest daughter would be the one to take me through all the "things" I missed raising my eldest daughter due to all the help I was privy to. Hardly anyone, aside from my mother would babysit Rahbyn because she was and still is, an attention seeking, busy-body, millions of questions-asking, child. There aren't many breaks with "this" one. Laughing within.

Because she possesses my curious personality, I have to keep close watch on her. I also, cannot trust many people to help me with her, because she can be overwhelming to handle at times and I don't want anyone to mistreat her out of frustration. She can be a bit too generous so I curb "that" as best as I can to prevent her from being taken advantage of.

I will admit, that because of the age gap between my daughters they each have to make personal sacrifices in order to keep us united as a family unit. What I mean by "this" is sometimes one can't participate in "something" which the other can and vice-versa. They have age appropriate interests "that" I must balance between. It'll be my youngest and I, once my eldest goes off to college this summer and I'll be able to give her more of my undivided attention.

Rahbyn Marie is an aspiring actress, gymnast, dancer and singer. 

Yes, entertaining is what she wants "to do." I've taken some beginning steps to help her reach these goals, but we're on hold while I do what's needed to ensure, that my eldest gets situated in college. I almost need a team or to become a supportive man's wife in order to pursue these acting dreams of hers aggressively because casting agents don't care about short notice nor do they understand my financial struggle and time constraints as a single parent. I'm brainstorming in the meanwhile how we'll approach a second round at "it."

The apple, which is one of her nicknames doesn't fall far from tree regarding intellect. She's much more compassionate than her sister and I. We're all sweet, but she's twice as. A little perfectionist who is also a role model for her peers. She excels academically, is passionate about learning, and likes to help. She's very loving too. I love my babies!!!

I named her Rahbyn because I wanted my children's names to sync and because I'm authentically unique, the spelling of her name is different from the bird name Robin. Yes, she sings too, but currently is more passionate about her acting, gymnastics and dancing. The sky is the limit and my human birds are going to fly high. No doubt. Manifesting!

My Canary. Human Bird.

My firstborn daughter was long overdue. I was beyond excited when I found out I was pregnant with her because I wanted to become a mom since middle school. So much, "that" I wrote down a list of names for baby boys and baby girls. Quenarii's name was taken from my personal list. Her name is pronounced as canary like the bird, however, I chose a unique spelling of her name to make "it" completely her own. We've only met one other girl with the same name, but spelled differently.

My daughter is the original, one and only, Quenarii on "this" planet in the entire universe. Ha!

I shared the news with her father, but we were on two different pages so I experienced my entire pregnancy as a single mother. Thank GOD I had my mom to talk to throughout "it." During "this" pregnancy we were best of friends.

Some of the most memorable experiences were my cravings for original Doritos chips dipped in chocolate chip ice cream and the stench of In & Out Burger, which made my morning sickness symptoms worse. I still, to "this" very day don't like the scent of In & Out Burger when I'm near one.

Now, about my big princess whom will turn 18-years old in less than two months. She's a beautiful, strong-willed, talented, intelligent, and a responsible, young Christian lady. My girl!!! She was a laid back baby and she's a laid back teen. Thank GOD!!!

She's always excelled academically and in her extracurricular campus activities. She was on the stepping team in middle school. She's currently on the dance-guard team and was a cheerleader during her junior year at her high school. I haven't even mentioned the role model she is to her peers and how she has stepped up in church when called upon.

A recommendation from her history teacher in middle school got her the opportunity to be accepted into the school she attends now. She was the first student at her high school to be accepted into a university. She's completing honors-level classes and has had a few advanced placement classes with the opportunity to earn college credits.


I really have a pretty-fantastic, awesome and amazing, well-representing, teen!

Because I once was a girl, I can comment accordingly. Girls are sassy and talk a lot. My teen is known by outsiders as quiet, but we know she can get beside herself with "that" mouth of hers. People tell me it's a common teenage phase, which helps, but I accept no excuses when "it" comes to respecting me as mom at all times. "This" was a huge challenge we faced last year, but "things" are shaping into positive gears between us as of now. I'm beyond glad.

My daughter is so much more on track in her life than I was at her age and I acknowledge "it." I do my best not to allow the financial setbacks I face to affect her having the best high school experience. "Where there's a will, there's a way" and I've got the will so ways are being made.

As we prepare for her prom, which happens to fall on the very same date as her birthday, I'm reminding myself, "that" by praying and keeping GOD at the forefront of my thoughts throughout each moment of each day, will help us to prosper. I cannot do "this" all on my own and I'm fully aware, but I know who can enable me to: JESUS!!!

I'm more blessed than I realize at times. My children are my greatest gifts. Becoming a mother to my beautiful firstborn daughter saved me from countless poor choices I'm sure I would've made. I felt the need to consider how my actions might impact my child's life. I still function with "this" thought in mind and "it" protects me from making too many careless decisions. I take my role as a mother seriously and witnessing how beautifully my big girl is blossoming is so rewarding.

So, does "this" uncaged bird sing and fly? Laughing out loud. Well, she does sing and once she completes her tumbling classes she'll be hand-springing in the air with wings of courage.

                                                                                             

How I. Love Them!!!

My Beauties!!! 

Just Some. Moments.

                      Queen                                                                        Princesses     

Establishing our family legacy. 

All About. Mine.

"This" week "it" will be all about my daughters. My blogging "that" is. These two keep me busy.

My girls at the WGSACs Miles' Davis Exhibit.

Me and my lovelies!!!

Nineteen Years Ago. "This" Date.

I was 19-years old. I almost accidentally checked out of life due to personal lack of self-control and rage during a moment... which eventually passed. The experience changed me. I'll have to say for the better. Had I not gone through suffering the consequences of such behavior "that" day; there's no telling what today for me, would be.

"It" may have been around "this" very hour on March 11, 1997. I remember waking up in the intensive care unit at Daniel Freeman Memorial Hospital, hooked up to monitors with my family surrounded around me. I remember exactly what my mother and brother said to me. My mom said, that I had been in surgery a long time. My brother asked me who was involved and told me he would go blow up the spot...

###

Time really does fly by.

 I love & miss them... They each equipped me with the strength and courage to stand. As I do now.  

Life checked me.

GOD Saved Me!!!

#LessonsLearned

*Daniel Freeman Memorial Hospital's emergency staff were on task, highly-skilled in their medical professions and helped to save my life. They also helped me give birth to new life and assisted with saving hers. How could a place like "this" close?

It's all about the money.

Here. Briefly.

I'll return to highlighting my VIPs next week...

Reflective Soul. Freny Azzy!!!

We have so much in common. Our approach to our home-life, work-life, and how we deal with men is quite similar. My friend Azzy is so much more than just my friend. I've adopted her as my sister. We share a mutual understanding about our friendship and respect "it" at all times.

We don't always agree and we speak bluntly to one another about our opinions/advice. I treasure being able to communicate openly and honestly, like "this." Not everyone's skin is thick enough to handle the bold truth, but Azzy and I can.

She was raised by both parents and is a mother to four boys; well, two are men now. Her mother told me, that she was spoiled rotten as a child by her father and is still a brat today. Laughing out loud.

She's a stubborn Taurus indeed! I've learned to accept her "no's" and to move on without getting frustrated because I couldn't persuade her otherwise. I've fussed at her time and time again, as she has also, fussed me down to the core. We are very much like sisters because we always work through our differences together.

"It" is safe to say, that we want to be in one another's lives because we both take the time putting our best efforts forth nourishing our relationship as friendsters. I love her so much and I'm blessed having her presence in my life!!!

I have yet to mention how brilliant she is. She speaks three different languages; American English, Spanglish/Spanish, and Creole. Her father taught her how to change the oil and tires on cars. She showed me the old-school way of securely discarding sensitive documents by throwing the excess paperwork in a barbecue pit and simply, setting it on fire. She forces me out of my comfort zone, which is sometimes necessary in order for me to stretch my capabilities. She's my rock.

Azzy is the fashionista of the bunch. She's brand conscious and always talking about my personal style of dress. We have a current bet going to see who'll reach their best level of fitness first by June 1. I plan to win. I'm going to beat her by incorporating a last minute crash course diet and power fitness regimen; sometime "this" month... Or even next month, while she takes the slow approach, battling with the daily pressures of temptation. Laughing within.

She keeps the fire lit beneath me. A constant reminder for me to present myself as my best self no matter what. She doesn't agree with me to please me and I need "that." Through her I see more of myself. Some sides needing more improvement and in other areas where I shouldn't neglect myself.

My Azzy can be a little mean, but so can I so I'm not at all judging. I love her as she is and I'm keeping her as my friendster forever. She is like a mirror to me and I've designated her as my life coach. Together, we're becoming stronger women, leading examples of how to run a household, and remaining success driven.

Golden Hearted. Lizzy-Wizzy.

I sometimes feel, that I'm unworthy of her friendship. She's so patient and understanding with me. We met 21-years ago. Who would've ever known, that we'd still be so relevant in each other's lives currently, today? No one, but GOD!!!

"This" lovely friend of mine has a golden heart. We have never argued. Debated; respectfully, but never have we crossed over the line into disrespect throughout our entire friendship. There's just "something" special about my Lizzy-Wizzy. I recognized "this" long ago and I protect her from my wrath when I'm experiencing challenging moments.

She probably feels a little excluded from my life at times, but she knows the truth. Having a friend whom knows me inside/out, but never places any judgement upon me or competes in our friendship helps me be more accountable of my actions or those lacking.

We both are GODmothers to our daughters. She has three and I have my two. I became a mom first, then she, then me again, then her again and again. Surprisingly, she gave birth to a third baby girl. No third birth for me and seeing her having to prioritize/manage her time with/between all of my GODdaughters further solidifies my choice to be done with having babies.

My Lizzy-Wizzy is one of the best mother's I know. I always knew she'd be a great mom, but her life actually, as a mom supersedes most of my best expectations. Did I mention how patient she is? I should take several notes because I've witnessed firsthand, how calmly she reacts in pinched moments. There's a level of cool, that doesn't escape her being; ever.

Tear-jerking share: I was a bit out of it when my mother first passed away. I don't know why, but I immediately began sending texts informing people. Lizzy-Wizzy was one. I don't know how she got to me so quickly, but she walked right into that hospital room and brought me comfort in one of the most life-changing awkward moments of my life. I believe she rushed off enroute to me at the end of one of her daughter's graduations.

Talk about a friend... I'm so blessed having "this" beauty to refer to as one of my bests. How she puts up with me; only GOD knows, but I love her beyond words!!! Thank you, LORD for allowing us to cross paths and keeping us close!!! 

Even when we're not communicating regularly. "That" doesn't change a "thing."

Spirit Food. Mr. CJ.

My playbrother is like a real brother, but seeing how I only had one biological brother whom was killed in 2003; I never want anyone to mistake either and I'll always keep my brother's memory alive by making mention of him.

There's an inside joke amongst those in my circle. They say, CJ and I are going to end up together. Laughing out loud and within. We know one another quite well, which is why I think it's pretty hilarious, that since we've been friends for so long other's think we should just "hook up" and become a couple. Neither of us would even consider jeopordizing our friendship on any attempt at becoming a couple.

CJ and I are exactly what the LORD wants us to be; friends. We share an honest friendship and a divine kinship. I learn a whole lot from him regarding the male perspective and he learns much about women through my personal insights. He has two younger sisters he grew up with so I take on the big sister role with him, although we're the exact same age; probably hours and minutes apart. We also share the same exact birthdate.

Aside from CJ being one of my most reliable friends, there are some milestones in my life where his presence will forever remain irreplaceable. He has a lifetime freedom pass into my life and he's definitely a VIP. I can't name every time or each occurrence where he's been dependable for not just me, but for my family as well because he's been here for me and my girls through almost everything.

He visited me in the hospital both times I gave birth. My daughters truly value him as their uncle. Every event we've invited him to, he attends. He's even surprised us with tickets to various outtings and performances. I can always count on him for a small loan when neeeded and he doesn't sweat me about the payback. He is listed as an emergency contact at both of my daughters' schools. By every account, he is my bestfriend, but I'm also very fortunate to count on him as my playbrother. He's the little brother I never had growing up and I love him just as he is!

Sidenote: He's a good man. One day he'll make a great husband and father to his own family. He loves the LORD with all of his heart and his daily actions are based upon "this" truth. Only GOD can fill him with the patience and understanding necessary to be categorized as a VIP in my life. I'm thankful, "that" he allows his cup to be filled with the Holy Spirit and for his willingness to deliver whatever/however accordingly.

I'm so blessed having him as a spiritual brother and to count on him as my friend. CJ is star in my world. I will cherish our friendship forever. 

#FACT