I'm Rushing! My 50th Blog.

Wow! I couldn't have predicted that I'd be so into this blog when I first began writing. It's so powerful for me now, that I can hardly imagine doing without it. I LOVE my blog!

I barely got here today. Time moved so swiftly. I wish, that I could say the same for my own movements. Even with an early start today, I was still a lagger while I cleaned my friend's apartment. My little one was with me, but I can't blame her for slowing me down. I kept her day productive within the midst of my own agenda.

In fact, I hadn't even thought about blogging today until I was on the way home. Again, I almost forgot. Oh my goodness me!

I don't even want to think about how I'd really feel about missing 1-day!

Fifty-days of consistent action on my part is OUTSTANDING!!! Especially the fact, that it's something I'm doing on a whim. Blogging is no longer a thought. "This" IS something that I now do and I'm in love with "it!" So, I'm going to continue doing "it." 

I'm growing. I'm developing. I'm transitioning.

Thank You JESUS!!!

Let's Talk. About LOVE!

Last night, my playbrother and I had an interesting conversation about "how the world/people is/are in 'this' day that we live in." We agreed that many folks are currently living in fear stemming from various reasons. Also, that so many people are unwilling to acknowledge/recognize and spread LOVE. It really IS a crying shame. However, together we "can" make a difference!

Two relationships touched me today. One was about the former NFL player, Chris Draft and his late-wife, Keasha Ruteleage-Draft. One of my friends posted Mr. and Mrs. Draft's wedding trailer onto Facebook where I first learned about their story. As sad as it is knowing, that they only shared 1-month together as a married couple, it's also amazingly incredible to see LOVE in ACTION shared by two people who obviously love one another without condition.

Please witness Mr. & Mrs. Draft in LOVE!!!

That IS LOVE. Lasting Opportunity Victorious Everyday. Undeniable GOD Strength!!!

The second relationship that caught my attention is between Jim Jones and Chrissy Lampkin. I just became aware of their relationship from the reality show that each starred in, "Love & Hip Hop." I didn't follow the show, but I did catch a reunion episode a couple of weeks ago. Today, I watched a few episodes, which aired on VH1's "Love & Hip Hop" marathon.

Naturally, I took notice to Chrissy's last name because I share the very same last name. I take pride in being a Lampkin and I wanted to see how well she represents the Lampkin name. I am proud of her. She stands her ground and takes action to get what she wants. She LOVES her man and IS in no way ashamed of "that" LOVE. Jim knows "this" and it's apparent the man LOVES her.

We should all mind our own business as we witness them minding theirs...

Both of the above mentioned relationships are/were founded on LOVE. It's evident by their outward gestures towards each other even on public display. The more I understand the truth about LOVE, I can wholeheartedly say today, that LOVE has no shame.

LOVE makes itself known. Period. 

How soon can we all stop questioning "it" and just let "it" be?

Get Rid. A.S.A.P!

I've been in a "let's get the job done" kind of mood this week. The timing for "this" couldn't be any better being the New Year's woman I am.

We took all the Christmas decorations down today. My youngest daughter helped remove each ornament and I took the tree to the dumpster. As an adult, I'm more excited about getting the tree out rather than in.

I finally began tackling our kitchen as well. It's been in useful order, but not cleaned to my satisfaction. I do go the extra mile when housekeeping for others.

It's about time, that I exercise the same attitude for myself! 

So, as the New Year approaches, I'm going through the process of elimination. That goes for all the "junk" around me and in my home. I too, will stay away from accumulating "it."

People who have no purpose in my life or who don't recognize any purpose in theirs, must go. I've had some friendships that were burdensome because those individuals didn't want to do right in their own lives. Without even realizing it at the time, I was enabling them by being there for the rescue when called upon.

What I mean by "do right" is taking responsibility for your own actions, attitudes and outcomes. There are so many "adult-babies" living amongst us presently. I am in the process of "growing myself up" as I blog and recognize personal areas of needed improvement/development.

I'm not only cleaning and organizing my home, but my mind, body and spirit as well. As childhood dreams resurface, I feel a strong urge to get ready. Ready for? Everything that has seemed and felt impossible up until "this" point.

Anything really IS possible. Just have to make room for "it."

Mommy Time. 1on1.

I can't believe I'm up doing "this" right now. Today IS a new day! I am within my structural "blogging" bounds. Laughing quietly... ;)

Since it's only my youngest and I for the next week, I'm thinking that I want to make our time together count a little more. I don't feel like I give a "fair amount" of "mommy time" to my children individually. I do what "I can," but really I want to do more...

So, I've decided when my little one awakens me in the morning (in a short-few hours), we're having school today. She's going to be shocked to see that I've set-up our homework and craft center on the dining room table. I'm calling myself out so I've prepared accordingly...

Of course, I'll be tired. I may not even feel like it. For my daughter I will. I'm sure it'll be a lot of fun, once said and done!

I'm also thinking about making sure, that my eldest gets her "mommy time" with me accordingly when she returns home. My daughters are over 7-years apart. Their difference in age is so relevant. I'm beginning to realize "this" in a way that I haven't before.

All day (today), my youngest and I will play in a manner that my eldest would quickly be bored with. When we're all together there are many "things," that my eldest understands, yet are incomprehensible for my youngest. Parenting is such a delicate responsibility...

As I learn more for myself, I'm doing my best to teach patience to each. One almost knows. One doesn't know yet. Sometimes, neither of them know any better.

How well "can" I teach? 

I Welcome. The New.

Christmas is over. Yes, LORD!!! We made it happily through and I can now plan accordingly. I love the New Year. I really do.

This year has been eventful. As I reflect back, in January I wasn't sure if we'd find somewhere better to live. I wasn't even sure if I was making the right decision about attempting to do so.

During my final semester at CSUDH this past Spring, I wasn't getting the necessary feedback from the office of records and admissions. I was very diligent with my efforts to ensure that I would indeed graduate, having completed all the required courses to receive my bachelor's degree. A couple of months before I graduated, I felt lost and couldn't define my purpose continuing with higher education.

In July, I began working full-time as an office manager for a small business. The experience was new and it confirmed that my skill-set is up to par. I also learned that I'll never have a high tolerance for nonsense. I thrive on fairness and honesty, which must be present in any workplace that I'll dedicate my time towards.

By October, I became unemployed and needless to say, financially "things" have been rough. Until, I change my perspective about money; no amount I make will suffice. I have some poor budgeting habits and I'm really just now acknowledging this. I can now reshape my thinking about finances and make better decisions regarding.

I attempted to position myself as "someone's" girlfriend, twice this year. I can admit, that I wouldn't mind having a life partner to share some responsibilities with and happiness in love, of course. I'm still not ready for the "Love of My Life." I believe now, I'd only appreciate him for what he can "do" because I haven't saved myself or my family yet...

There's still some personal goals that I want to fulfill before I enter into an intimate lifelong relationship. I have to get the Lampkin household in complete order. This means being able to cover my overhead comfortably so that I'm willing to "do" other "things" like date, doll myself up just because, and attract the proper attention.

So 2012, I've been looking forward to getting into you. I am more ready than I've never been. It's about time, that I stand tall (20-feet) and walk within the heals of success and not just on them. I not only see, but feel and believe in my abilities just like/more than so many others who've crossed my path.

The immature games in my adulthood are officially OVER!!! 

Revisited. Gladly!

Oh, my beautiful brussells sprouts! Overcooked them once again. They're still tasty and I'm going to eat each one, mushy and all. I'll just try to cook them properly next time...

I spoke with my sister Tonia, today. We had a deep conversation and she triggerred something within me. She needs the confident older sister who's about her business to stop playing. Yes, that older sister is me. My sister can use some companionship and a shoulder to lean on and I'm incapable of making that happen for her immediately. Personally, I feel that it's a shame.

Am I waiting on Prince Charming or what? I mean seriously. I'm holding onto my household by a very thin thread and I admit, I'm not putting my best foot forth in the right areas like I know "I can." I'm so over being a big baby about all things. Not being able to be there for my sister like I really wish I could doesn't settle easily with me.

Then, my next younger sister Tiffany just gave birth to her second baby girl and where am I? Too complacent with my position in life and not really seeing how selfish I've been. Now, I'm not in any way coming down on myself too harshly. Real is real and this reality has to change for the better.

I have sisters. We didn't have to be raised together to share a common bond. We're all women and mothers. None of us are married. How okay is "that" really?

What really matters is, that we have a support group with eachother. I'm the eldest and I want them to be able to reach out to me without hesitance. I don't want them thinking about my struggle and going "it" alone because of.

Creating a strong family foundation is a lifelong dream that I have. It seems that I've lost track with my pursuit of, until I spoke with my sister today. It's so not over!

I thought that I was over brussells sprouts. I hadn't had any since my childhood and back then, I thought they were the most disgusting vegetable grown. My children didn't even know what they were until recently because I've never brought them into our home. It was when my aunt brought them prepared properly to our family Thanksgiving dinner this year, that I was reminded nothing, but GOD is absolute.

I will keep pushing, fight harder, and try without resistance. I need me and so does my family. Word!!!

I Can. Commit.

This has felt like a lazy week or shall I say, that I've felt very lazy. I have accomplished some "things" like getting my eldest packed and off to her dads this past Monday. I returned to my aunts place today (day 2 this week) to help her finish with holiday cleaning. She asked if I would come help last weekend.

Man, I feel beat. Let's see... I haven't dedicated any time to fitness lately. I've been eating chocolate cake like a kid eats candy. Oh yeah, the fast-food we've been consuming must be contributing to my lack of energy.

Something has to be done about this and immediately! 

The only "thing" that I've recently been committed to is writing this blog. I think it's about time that I kick "things" up a notch. The timing couldn't be more fitting either. With the New Year ringing in next weekend, it truly is a time for doing away with the unnecessary. I'm ready to welcome the "newness" that my heart desires.

Just a snippet of a few desires I have...

1. To eat healthy regularly.
2. To exercise daily.
3. To do/make something creative often.
4. To earn/save BIG $.
5. To let go of bad habits.

Nothing listed above is impossible and I know this so well. What I know better is, that if I remain consistent with the above mentioned, I'll experience positive results continuously. I "can" and I will.





I AM CLAIMING POSITIVE RESULTS CONTINUOUSLY ON A CONSISTENT BASIS!!!